Excerpt
Ken stood beside the truck, unable to move, his eyes taking in a sight
that no human should see; his eyes seeing things that no man who loved
should ever look at. Something inside him melted – hot lava overflowing
from some place in his chest, spilling out, like life oozing through his
pores. “Why can I have everything in life except what is most precious to
me?” Did he cry it out loud? Did he think it?
He rushed to the truck – tried to wrench the door open – his palms
blistered with fire – he felt no pain. The RCMP officer pulled him away.
He fought while the officer wrestled him to the ground. Others arrived,
and more hands pulled him away. Arms wrapped around him. He was
numb; he was raging; he was shaking uncontrollably.
People pulled him back up the steep slope and bundled him into the
back seat of the police cruiser, wrapping him in layers of blankets. Nothing
could stop his limbs shivering. Blackness crept in on the edges of his
vision, and he felt as though he had dropped into the bottom of a deep,
dark well. It was all a dream that he would awaken from. But, no – there
would be no awakening. He was caught in a nightmare, and he had no
control – none. His mind, body, and soul splintered. He could feel the
jagged edges of what used to be Ken, and he was helpless to piece them
back together again.
At some point he felt the cruiser move. Then it stopped and he heard
voices, and saw Long John’s face hovering over his. At the camp, the officer
took him to the clinic where they treated the burns on his hands and
released him into John’s custody, with orders that he was not to be left
alone. But late that night, after John had dozed off, Ken staggered out to
his truck and drove to the ranch. He entered Jessica’s room and lay down
in her bed. His fingers touched the sheets; he inhaled the sweet odour of
her and tried to blot out the picture of the body in the truck. He pictured
his Jessica – his beautiful magnificent Jessica – his love.
He lay on the bed, staring at the guns on the wall. And he fought the
biggest battle of his life. Eventually he fell asleep, only to be embraced by
the nightmare of reliving the day over and over again.
When he opened his eyes, he looked up at a woman with a large, round
face who was sitting on the edge of the bed. Her eyes were swollen and red.
“I’m no longer here,” Ken thought. “I’ve been transported somewhere.”
“It’s okay,” the woman said. “I’m Jessica’s auntie.” And she began weeping.
Then she lay down beside Ken, and they lay together drifting in and
out of dreams. The stove had long gone out, but neither of them noticed
the cold.
Hours or minutes passed. Ken had no sense of time. He heard a door
Libros Libertad 